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    Archive for the ‘Private’ Category

    Protected: Ever had a time…

    Friday, July 23rd, 2004

    …in your life where everything is going bad? I think ive hit that currently. Yet at the same time things are so wonderful with me and zan. but on of the things going bad is shes left for vermont. Still dating though…
    and ive just learned today that dads applied for a job in MARYLAND. The people are serious about dad as a worker there. it starts in sept if he gets it, so i start school then leave in the beginning. Whats life trying to tell me? Help me

    Protected:

    Thursday, July 22nd, 2004

    Poor Zan. Nothing going for her. Couldnt leave today, car decided it wasnt ready. Also realized personally that if i tried to be with someone else, it wouldnt work. I couldnt open up to anyone except Susannah. I couldnt open up with anyone else the way i do zan. Realized also im spoiled in the way of food, too much fast food and i start to not have an appetite.
    A lighter note but not really: i got my schedule for the 2004-2005 school year. With that came a reinstation of my report card, a 3.5 gpa, and all the other goodies for parents to know.

    Zan: Whenever im not around you, i feel you in spirit. Watching over me even if you are still here on Earth and not gone away.

    Everyone be nice to Zan

    Its just hit me…

    Friday, July 9th, 2004

    Its just hit me. The internet is an amazing tool. Its not just fun. Think about Happy Dale, its uniting 2 people from NC to well alot of people in vermont. Think about AIM or ICQ or any of the others, people across the nation, even across the WORLD, can type and even TALK to a person living 20000 miles away. I met Rosie and Laura through AIM via wheaton. Things like the livejournal community that zannah created. Things like this blog, email. All ways to express whatever you feel. And that we do. So much freedom, so little time. And so much you can do. People can stay informed with the latest news, from tech to worldwide news such as bbc news. Even to news in our own hometown. All online. Amazing. And to think the internet sprouted from a military technology to keep all the military united in case of something bad with redundancy to avoid a disaster area. Email is another example of military tech going worldwide. And now just about everyone is online, many now joining the group carrying broadband internet(thats the fast stuff). So thank the military for giving this technology to the public, and thank blogger for their great blogging service

    i glimmer of hope crosses throu…

    Tuesday, July 6th, 2004

    i glimmer of hope crosses through the summers night
    a star, gleaming its last, falling to an unspeakable place
    where man is happy
    and so are all the others

    tumbling, falling…

    Sunday, July 4th, 2004

    tumbling, falling
    lost in a vault that is so vast, no one can escape
    feelings once there, no gone
    need directions, need help
    need space
    to figure out life
    to figure out everything
    life spiralling down
    into a vat of pain
    loselessness
    the good feelings are gone
    i am gone
    i once was found, but now am lost
    forever

    Protected: I dont know

    Saturday, July 3rd, 2004

    I really wish i knew whats wrong with me. Zannah seems to see something wrong in how im acting today. I really hope its only today. I think it may be parental acceptance on both side, but i really wish i knew

    Tis sad…

    Friday, July 2nd, 2004

    ok, lets just say ive been living on peanut butter jelly sandwiches and hot dogs all week. Thats right ladies and gentlemen: i cant cook. Though the fact remains ive been with zannah alot during the time that is known as lunch, and when im around her i feel full. In every single aspect of the word. We said we wouldnt, but we seem to be seeing each other every day. And it will be hard to adjust whence school starts, but she’ll have work so it wont be as bad for her. As for me, the stress will run back in a bone-mangling second. But that is soooooooooo far away and thats waaaaaaaaaayy good

    did i forget?

    Tuesday, June 29th, 2004

    I believe i forgot to mention: i made so many great friends up in vermont. you know who you are, and thank you. sometimes i find myself reflecting on years past, and what has gone on during my lifetime. The one thing is, i never seem to think about events that have affected our nation, our world. That holds some exemptions. I know about loss of ozone and forest deepletion and rain forest depletion. But thats more about the stupid stuff humans do and they all have a common theme: nature. Nature is the most awesome thing imaginable, and we cannont recreate it. ever. And now, more than ever, we need to appreciate it. Alot of americans stay up all night watching tv. Eating fast food. laughing and drinking. I never see myself doing that. I want to be outside. forever. I want to live where its never too hot to be outside, and never too cold or snowy. Id love to live in vermont, even though its not fitting the criteria of what i just said. And its not about family being up there or all the great people wheaton is around all the time. Its nature and vermonts people who want to protect it. I never look at politics, i dont really care about it. I refuse to vote for a president ever. It doesnt matter to me who “rules over” the USA, as long as i can be outside all i want, enjoying nature; a thing we have and may never be able to recreate.

    To everyone i say this: avoid staying inside as much as possible. Enjoy nature, while you still can. Cause one day, maybe not when we are alive, maybe when we are still living, nature will cease to exist. And that will be a sad day. Not just for America, but for the entire globe. And what it runs down to is the human race in unison dont belive they are the rulers of the world. And it comes to the realization that america has so many freedoms, they think that all the american freedoms give them reason to destroy our beautiful country with skyscrapers, expensive housing, and statues that take up the whole horizon. We, as americans, dont realize that not everyone has the rights we have. And i think even if other countries had the power to create all the things we can and deforest everywhere, they wouldnt. The thing is they do it for the money. they are the ones raising cattle for us to eat. they are falling land to raise the food we eat. We take for granted what we have in this world: all the technology and fast food and edible food when other countries have absolutly nothing.

    I have not seen the other big countries, but i feel they are the same. You guys arent the above described people, but realize that some of our nation is.

    Mountains

    Thursday, June 17th, 2004

    thought I’d have some more fun with the gimp, i really like not having tv. This picture for you zannah

    heh heh

    Monday, June 14th, 2004

    REAL WORK WITH REAL MONEY TODAY!!! None of this “you have to work to live here” crap, MONEY MONEY MONEY(ABBA). We are moving some person out of their old house and into the new house or something of that sort

    miss you zan